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Training Business

Apr 25, 2019

Negotiation is a value-conversation you have with others. So the first thing we need to tackle is the value-conversation you have with yourself before you ever open your mouth. Does that make sense?

Today, we are responding to a question from a listener who asked not to be named. She has described herself as a ‘sucker on pricing’

Question: Is that how you talk to yourself?

Do you give yourself a hard time when describing your ability to get what you want from others?

Negotiation is a value-conversation. So the first thing we need to tackle is the conversation you have with yourself before you ever open your mouth. 

We are going to look at the psychology of negotiation through three words beginning with ‘p’: positive, perspective and preparation. Part 2 next week looks at the next three ‘p’s, which are: perception, packaging and price (last).

Fix internal dialogue

I want you to grab a pen and write down what value you think your training business value represents to your clients.

Put a daily number on it. I also want you to write down how good you think you are at persuading others to give you this amount. 

Are you surprised by what you have written? Do you see a disconnect between the two? What are you feeling as you read the number(s) and the words on front of you? 

The bad news is that this disconnect explains

  • 1. Why you are perhaps unhappy with your pricing
  • 2. why your clients don’t pay you what you want.
  • 3. Why you dread a negotiation (or value-conversation)   

The good news is that you can take steps to do something about it.

The ‘internal dialogue’ you have with yourself BEFORE any negotiation determines your success WHEN you have that negotiation. 

Negotiation favours those who BELIEVE they can win

Look at those beliefs again. Are they true? Or are they just False Expectations Appearing Real (FEAR). 

Great! Now replace them with positive beliefs based on your value to your training clients.

That’s the language that needs to be rehearsed inwardly so that when you come to a negotiation or value-conversation, your beliefs support you rather than working against you. 

Choose your perspective

Discussing your value with your clients or prospects need not be a courtroom battle if you do decide to renegotiate.

It’s a solution-focused conversation, so be creative and stretch the boundaries.

Negotiation is a game so your perspective is key . She who cares least, wins! 

Negotiation or re-negotation is not life or death. Very seldom has anyone ever said ‘take it or leave’ it to me. Has anyone ever said that to you? I would be surprised.

People expect to have to negotiate with you. They even admire it. 

But, you need to offer value. And you need to be willing to trade value. If you want to renegotiate your rates upwards, that ok. But you need to be willing to concede something in return.

Distributive negotiation suggests that there is only so much to go around. There is only so much money. There are only so many options. There is only what I want versus what you want on the table. 

This is conducive to win-lose-or lose-win thinking.

If you cannot see options beyond those on front of you, you may not even want to try. You may tell yourself that ‘negotiating is only going to make things worse’. Really?

Integrative negotiation suggests that there are options you may have not yet thought of. So, you need to think creatively and collaboratively, 

The key point is that if you and your team has the right perspective, you can find a way to get your client to accept your prices as long as your suggestion creates greater value for her. 

Biggest takeaways you don’t want to miss: 

  • Why your internal conversation with yourself determines your negotiation success
  • Why you need to trade value rather than trading price
  • Whether it is better to renegotiate bad prices or replace a bad deal
  • Why your perspective will shape your negotiation success every time
  • Which 4 questions you need to ask yourself before you negotiate
  • Why preparation vastly increases your chances of getting what you want

Some helpful resources for you

Getting to Yes – Finding agreement with others – Fisher and Ury
The Negotiation Book – Defining successful negotiation – Steve Gates
Successful Negotiation – Free online course – University of Michigan